Half-Truths and Choices

As I sit here wrestling through the emotions that I’m feeling and the voices in my head I was struck with a thought.  It’s easy to combat the lies but it’s so much harder to combat the half truths.  “You can’t do this.” “You aren’t strong enough.” “You don’t have enough time.” “You aren’t good enough.”  These half-truths are rooted in our insecurities and they feel so real and if I choose to focus on them I am overwhelmed and incapacitated.  But what I am realizing is that these half truths are just that, they are half of me.  The half that strives absent of the strength of Christ.  If I choose to take my eyes off of Him and place them back on myself I become paralyzed.

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  About four years ago I did a bible study on James and it rocked my world.  I had spent so much of my life being a hearer of the word and not a doer (James 1:23) and I was struck with the thought that this truth was going to change my world in a huge way.  I now wonder if that was the start of God preparing me to systematically undo this American life I have spent my entire life building.  As I go through my house throwing away and giving away all that we’ve accumulated I’m both grieved with the death of a dream and grieved by the time wasted.  “Get a good education.” “Get Married.” “You need a nice house in a nice neighborhood.” “You need to have a plan for the future.” “You need a stable career.”  “You deserve nice things.”  These investments in the temporal are so prevalent in our American culture I don’t even think we realize how they permeate and dictate our paths.  We make a great plan and then invite God in to bless the life we have made.

I refuse to live this way anymore and that is where the half truths creep in.  When we stop investing in the temporal and choose to invest in the eternal the doubt and the fear creep in.  And I am faced with a choice, will I choose to focus on my own inabilities and insecurities or will I choose to walk by faith following a good and loving Father that has had this path paved for me before the beginning of time.

The number one question I have gotten since we announced that we were going to move our family to Croatia to share the love of Jesus we have experienced with the people there is “What about your kids?”  The irony of that question is I’m doing this because Jesus has asked me to and that my obedience is partially driven by my love for my kids and my desire for them to lay down their lives for Him.  What would the world look like if the people that knew Him would stop being hearers of the word and start being doers.  One of the biggest lies we tell ourselves is that there are great Christians, great Believers, Paul, Peter, John, Billy Graham, John Piper, John MacArthur… There are no great Christians, there is only one Mighty God that is worth dying to all these temporal things and embracing the eternal. Those “Great Christian” believed that and lived there lives in a way that showed it.

I choose to stop focusing on the half-truths and fix my eyes on Christ.  I choose to invest in the eternal no matter the cost.  I choose to live out the truths I am learning.  I choose to embrace the unknown path that God has prepared for me. What will you choose? 

Corrin Molvar